Music on the Grand Canyon

The Boatmen Song 
by Will Putman and Trudy Heffernan

Chorus
We are the Boatmen we suffer no fools
We are the Boatmen and these are the rules

Wash the mud off your sandals and get in the boat
Do up your life vest, that's right you won't float
Don't ask stupid questions, just bail out the floor
And when you climb out, don't step on the oar 
Chorus

We know what we're doing, you haven't a clue
If you're lucky we'll find you some lame task to do
Don't volunteer help, you incompetent fools
Just stay out of the way and follow the rules
Chorus

We'll lead you on hikes up high canyon walls
You're awkward and clumsy, we'll make sure you don't fall
We know you'd get lost, so we'll help you back down
It's a steep twisting trail, and this ain't your downtown
Chorus

When you hear "Hot Coffee" get your butt out of bed
Do you think you can manage to get yourself fed
We'll do the rowing, the cooking and such
Wash your plate and fork, or is that asking too much?
Chorus

Wash off your hands before we have grub
But no soap in the streams for the poor humpback chub
Pick up your garbage, don't piss in the sand
In fact, don't piss anywhere up on dry land
Chorus

Morning and evening are the times to go crap
We really don't care for a mid-day mishap
We'll stop if we have to, but mark our words
We'll make you pay for your untimely turds
Chorus

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